There are 3 certainties in life: death, taxes, and that any joke a college professor tells is less funny than George Lopez and Tyler Perry combined with a documentary on Auschwitz. In case your mental math is shaky, that’s about as unfunny as you can get.
Here’s one I got today:
Professor: “There will be four pop quizzes this semester that I’ll tell you about in advance.”
Class: ….
Professor: “That’s was a joke.”
Class: ….
And then six people shot themselves in the face. SIX! That’s how unfunny the joke was. A few people threw up in their mouths and one kid started shaking and pissing his pants because after realizing how bad the joke was, he saw no hope for humanity in general and was convinced that the Rapture was shockingly imminent.
My theory is that if you’re going to tell a joke, at least make sure it’s gonna get some kind of reaction. Introduce yourself, black joke. Explain the course objectives, blonde joke. Elucidate the grading system, dead baby joke. And have a little showmanship for christ’s sake.
That’s it for me! Goodnight everybody!
